


Hate Bang: A Star Wars Story

by RedxRobin



Category: Marvel (Comics), Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Blow Jobs, M/M, My First Smut, Not Reylo friendly, Rimming, Star Wars References, Underoos, a lot of love, billyteddy, movie review but with sex!, tighty whities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2019-12-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:40:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21999127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedxRobin/pseuds/RedxRobin
Summary: Billy and Teddy go on their almost annual anniversary date to see Star Wars Episode XI: The Rise of Skywalker. When they leave disappointed, Billy comes up with a way to make it up.A not so subtle self-projected thoughts on the movie included.
Relationships: Teddy Altman/Billy Kaplan
Comments: 6
Kudos: 37





	Hate Bang: A Star Wars Story

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy, first smut so may be awkward.

“Excited baby?”

Billy was staring off into space and was snapped out of it by Teddy’s voice beside him. The couple were waiting out in the long red hallway of the cinema, outside the cinema door of _Star Wars Episode XI: The Rise of Skywalker_ in nervous anticipation. 

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” he replied 

“I’m still a little nervous” Teddy said, using the hand that was holding his boyfriend’s and not a drink to rub his back “I know how much this means to you” 

“To you too, baby. When we first met, one of the first things we did together was binge all six movies in preparation for _Force Awaken_ s” Teddy said, smiling from the memories “Our first sleepover...” 

“Double sleepover. You were so cute then. Well we were both super bashful anyway” replied Billy smirking “I just loved listening to you talk about them, and getting excited over favourite scenes together” 

“And then Force Awakens a day later for our first date, so so so glad that movie was good” 

“I would have loved it even if it wasn’t, cause I got to spend it with you” Billy said reaching up on his tippy toes to smooch Teddy, who eagerly returned it “Our first kiss too...” 

“I didn’t know if I should’ve, I haven’t… dated anyone before but I just- I just felt like I had to, I just couldn’t believe I had this beautiful geeky boy with me” Teddy added reliving the nerves of that night “B-but it worked out in the end” 

“It did, then after the premiere, f-first time sleeping in the same room, same bed... without pjs” said Billy giggling “Almost fainted at those, uh, tighty whities” 

“I-I’m glad you liked them, cause I don’t really have other options haha” Teddy replied blushing 

“I did, you looked so hot” said Billy quietly as other people were surrounding them “They suit you well, they show off a lot...”

“I-I also pegged you for an underoos guy too, i-it's cute you had Star Wars ones for our marathons” replied Teddy giggling trying to control himself in public “Saw you put them on today, exact same pair, BB-Briefs” 

“Just wanted to show my Star Wars love” giggled Billy back with a cheeky smile, obviously much more happier joking around on immature subjects with his man. Along with Billy’s secret Star Wars undies, they both were also wearing Star Wars t-shirts underneath jackets, each having a Luke and Han aesthetic to them. Even their shoes were R2-D2 and C3-PO themed for Billy and Teddy respectively. 

“It’s hot, you’re like a little jedi twink” Teddy said giggling, which made Billy giggle into another kiss. They turned to hear a groan from another dudebro in a Captain America shirt looking at them rudely. If only he knew. 

“W-what about what we did after...?” Billy said quietly, ignoring him but returning to his shy demeanour that Teddy always helped make go away.

“That was hot too, j-just heat of the moment thing” replied Teddy winking “A great mini teaser for the next few years. And now, here we are” The doors finally opened and people crawled in. The handsome couple walked hand-in-hand into the theatre, drinks and popcorn in hand, up the stairs to the back, ignoring the glares from the same dudebros at the sight. The ads were still playing on the large screen long after they sat down in the centre of the back row. Teddy put his strong arm around his boyfriend as Billy fed him popcorn with a smile, occasionally throwing in an eskimo kiss. 

“Still nervous, hon?” Billy asked while Teddy was swallowing. 

“Sure, I think. I-I don’t know, it might just be anticipation” he replied as he picked up a single piece of popcorn and held it near Billy’s mouth, who quickly nipped it, “You?”

“Mmmm, yeah I suppose” said Billy whilst chewing before swallowing to accept another “Just it’s a lot of pressure, being the last Skywalker saga film. I don’t even know how they’re gonna wrap it up with little to go from. Just want it to be good and perfectly satisfying” 

“Either way, it’ll be worth talking about” replied Teddy washing the popcorn down with soda. 

“And either way, when we get home” added Billy quietly, amongst the chatter of the crowd “W-we can finish our Star Wars premiere tradition” 

“I like the sounds of that baby” Teddy replied smooching his boyfriend eagerly “Thank you” 

“For what?”

“Being here, being my boyfriend, didn’t think I’d get this far with you” 

“No problem, and thank you yourself” Billy replied blushing hard “I love you”

“Love you too” Teddy said as the lights dimmed and the screen to black. Billy rubbed Teddy’s thigh excitedly, probably causing another excitement further up. Later.... just gotta hope the movie is good. 

**LUCASARTS**

**_A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR FAR AWAY…._ **

\--------------

“Oh fuck! fuck! Ahh! Ah!”

They’ve been home for no more than no more than 10 minutes and Teddy already had Billy on his back on their bed, thrusting furiously as his boyfriend moaned continuously. Thank gods they soundproofed, they were known to be quite vocal. In that moment, Teddy wasn’t Teddy, he was Hulkling. Large green hands clamped to Billy’s waist, breathing heavily and moaning almost in unison.

When they returned home that 8 minutes ago, Billy was on Teddy as soon as the door closed of their barely moved-in Manhattan penthouse. Teddy, who while in a tired mood, eagerly accepted Billy’s tongue down his throat in the messy kiss. Billy knew Teddy was immensely disappointed, himself not as much but Teddy was almost silent as soon as they left the theater, so he wanted to make it up to him. Billy let his jacket fall as Teddy took his Jedi shirt off, almost throwing it away. His skin was slowly changing back to green as he grew taller and buffer, almost automatically. Billy kinda preferred it, as much as Teddy is torn between the two skins. In between kisses, he pulled Billy’s shirt off, running his big hands over his boyfriend’s smaller and lithe body.

Billy tried to moan but ended up giggling a little as Teddy’s hands moved up and down his waist. He hooked two sharp fingernails around Billy’s belt and snapped it undone. Teddy was usually very sensual, and he was trying to in the moment but he needed a distraction now. His finger unzipped the fly and the strong hands quickly pulled Billy’s pants down, as Billy hovered to get them off his feet, leaving him in his Star Wars briefs. They were black with white BB-8’s scattered all over them, which were among Teddy’s favorites on him, even if seeing them now brings back not-so-good memories. Billy was already desperately trying to get Teddy’s button on his jeans undone, the rapidly approaching anticipation making his hands shake. He snapped it open and Teddy practically ripped his pants down so he can join Billy in his tighty whities. The sight of Teddy in his signature white briefs while he was in what was essentially his superhero skin, plus an incredibly large cock outline aching through the material made Billy actually drool on the spot. He just had to be on his mouth again. He jumped on Teddy’s body, wrapping his legs around his waist and running his fingers through his hair. Teddy, who anticipated it, held his small but bubbly butt in his big hands and walked quickly towards their bedroom.

Upon entry, Teddy dropped Billy on the bed before settling himself on him a second later. Billy eagerly accepted Teddy’s strong kiss as he moved his hands up around his back and his hair, while his legs moved up and down his sides. Teddy did the same with his hands on Billy’s. Billy moved his hand to roll Teddy over and climbed on with his legs on either side, all while maintaining the heavy kiss. Teddy’s strong hands moved to Billy’s butt almost immediately, rubbing the bubbly globes through the material, thumb playing under the leg hole towards his eager hole. Billy moaned loudly into the kiss as Teddy fingered him through his briefs, before moving his hands to pull the back waistband down. He rolled Billy over again, covering his body but hands never leaving his now exposed butt. Billy followed suite and reached down Teddy’s back to rub his boyfriend’s butt too. He managed to reach it, Teddy maneuvering a bit so Billy can get a better grip, massaging his butt through his white underwear, playing with the waistband. Teddy moaned as he continued to do the same to the smaller boy. 

Getting up, he reached down with his fingers to pull his Star Wars briefs off him, tossing them behind him. Billy’s already hard leaking dick bounced back on his stomach and he smiled in response, licking his lips with a wide excited smile waiting for Teddy. His briefs doing nothing to hide his erection, the white cotton highlighted beautifully with his green skin, already having a wet spot at the end. Teddy whipped his white briefs off his legs, tossing them back to join Billy’s. Long hard green dick swinging as he moved back towards the bed. He laid his body back on top of Billy and continued to kiss him furiously. He moved his body up and down, rubbing Billy’s dick across his stomach. He moved down to Billy’s jawline and then to his neck, aiming to leave as many hickeys as possible there.

“Movie- ahh, really got to you, didn’t it Ted?” Billy said struggling to talk, he rubbed his hands across Teddy’s hair and back. Legs returning to their favorite place around his waist. Teddy just growled that sounded more like an “eh” as he moved down to lick at Billy’s nipples. “Ah, ahhhh- Sure you don’t wanna- mmm, talk about it honey? I- ah, know how much it means to you-“

“Sorry baby, I just- I gotta get this out of my system” Teddy cut in, lifting his head on it’s way down to his belly button, hands stroking his sides still. He nodded back down and continued to kiss his way down, following a hairless trail all the way down to Billy’s abdomen and making his dick slide across Teddy’s chin, earning more moans.

“Ah- shiiiit, ahhh. You sure? I-I-I kinda wanna talk- oh fuuuuuck ahhh” Teddy inhaled Billy’s dick in one swift motion and bobbed up and down, running his tongue across the side. Billy gripped the sheets as his toes curled. A trail of drool rolled down the side only to be absorbed when Teddy came back down. Billy tried to start another sentence but his eyes rolled to the back of his head as soon as Teddy slides back up to suck on his cut head. He reached down to run his fingers through Teddy’s messy blonde hair. Suddenly Teddy pulled off with a pop.

“Why the heck was Rey a Palpatine?” he said rubbing Billy’s thighs, closer and closer to his butt. Billy looked up at the view of Teddy in between his legs “I know you guessed it right, but they should’ve revealed that in the last one. You know, so it would stick with her more…” He pushed Billy’s legs up and used his big hands to massage Billy’s cheeks.

“I-I agree, I-I d-don’t know” Billy stammered as Teddy spread his cheeks, catching his boyfriend smile at the sight “W-wait, d-doesn’t it make it incest? C-cause- ahh-ahh fuuuuuuuck” Teddy licked one deep line at Billy’s smooth tight entrance.

“As you were saying, baby” he said going down for another.

“Ahhh, ah- The-e-ey made Pa-a-alpatine A-anakin’s father, with the forc- ah fuuck, again” this was getting harder to talk, let alone breathe every time Teddy does this “S-o Rey and- aahhh- Kylo kissing would be i-i-incest”

“Hm, didn’t think about that” Teddy replied stopping while Billy was still a sweaty, panting mess “Pretty sure they disproved that in that one comic you’re talking about. But still gross seeing how there was no indication they liked each other that way. You’re lucky your hot or you’d turn me off with that incest straight talk, cutie” Billy kinda regretted making him talk in he moment, but before he knew it, Teddy returned back to his one of his favorite places and continued to lap fast and deep in Billy’s hole.

“Ahhhhhhhh f-f-f-uuuck, d-don’t stop!” 

“Moving too fast and deep for ya baby?” Teddy suddenly stopped again “Kinda like the pacing for the movie, not letting you really-“ he stuck his tongue in.

“Ah”

“Feel” And again

“Ahh”

“Anything” and again

“Ahhhh, v-very funny hon- ahhhh fuuuuck” Teddy was back at it, this time slipping in a big finger to continue to spread him. He had to make sure he’s comfortable enough to… accommodate.

“So Chewie died for like 5 seconds cause they couldn’t deceive anyone for like 10 seconds” he lifted his head up again “And hardly anyone gets any screen time” he inserts a finger into Billy’s hole so he can multitask.

“Ahhh, I liked Rose” Billy moaned, didn’t think he’d be moaning a girls name “W-wish she- ah, had more to do-o. A-and Connix too, she-e should’ve gotten more”

“And Hux, he actually got cool but they just killed him for no reason” Teddy added adding another finger, which didn’t seem to phase Billy much. He’s had bigger, or at least he’s going to.

“A-and Snap, w-wish he didn’t die” Billy choked out, relaxing to the sensations of Teddy’s fingers.

“It’s because you had a cruuush” Teddy sang out teasingly.

“S-shut up Ted, you know Poe’s my main man in that universe” Billy replied quickly, trying to get rid of the stutter but with those hands it was impossible. “D-don’t act like yo-ou- ahh, didn’t pop one when young Lu-u-ke., mmm, showed up”

“Yeah? Almost” Teddy raised and eyebrow with a cheeky grin “He’s cute, but not as nearly as cute as you baby”

“Poe’s not as good as you either” Billy moaned out, looking at Teddy with a smile, which was gladly returned “I’m still bitter Finnpoe wasn’t c-canon- ahh” Teddy softened his hand and played with Billy’s balls with a free thumb, before moving down for a few quick licks at them. 

“Yeah, but don’t worry. Background lesbian kiss totally made up for it” the sarcasm was strong with this one “We’ll give them something better” Teddy moved up Billy’s body and smashed his lips onto Billy’s again, sticking his tongue down his throat, all the while continuing to finger his hole. Billy moaned into the kiss and grabbed on tighter to Teddy with his body, pulling him closer with his legs. Teddy pulled his finger out much to Billy’s disappointment.

“Ah- spell please, baby” Teddy moaned. 

“lubebuttlubebuttlubebuttlubebuttlubebutt” As soon as Billy learned that extremely random spell, he didn’t need to apply or prep manually ever again. He just needs to improve the douche spell he put on the way home and make it stay that way, for all the reasons. Teddy smiled and lined his incredibly large dick with Billy’s lubed hole.

“Ready to jump to hyperspace?” Teddy said giggling. Gosh he was so cute.

“Y-yeah, you’ve lightened up” Billy replied

“Well, talking clears my head, and I’ve got the one thing that won’t disappoint me” Teddy said as he pushed slowly inside, with Billy moaning and cringing at the size. He can never get used to it, and he loved it. 

“A-and who would that be?” Billy teased, trying to catch his breath again “Iron-Man?”

“Ew, heck no. You of course” he continued to push and Billy continued to moan “Once again, you’re lucky you’re hot”

“Ahhh fuuck ahh-ahhh” he was panting like crazy already, till he felt Teddy’s heavy sack rub against his cheeks. Teddy breathed out and slowly pulled out almost all the way before steadily pushing back “Ahh, Teddy…. Faster, light-speed” Teddy probably would have cummed at any point Billy moaned out a quote. But he needs to keep control, it needs to last longer. He pulled out halfway again and thrust back at a faster pace. And again. And again. And again.

“Oh fuck, fuck, Teddy! Oh babe! Fuck!” he moaned loudly, he will never get tired of this feeling. But something about Teddy tonight felt…. Rougher. Teddy leaned down and captured Billy’s lips in another messy kiss. After a few short moments of slowly building up his thrusts and tongue wrestling, Teddy grabbed Billy’s hips and plowed into him at a hard, rapid pace.

“Fuck Billy! Ah- baby, mmph, you feel so good, so tight” Teddy moaned out as he stood at the end of the bed, slowly pushing himself onto it, and moving Billy upwards towards the pillow end “How- how the heck did the Resistance get so many people? W-when- ah, so many didn’t support them constantly?”

“Ahh, fuck ah, I don’t know! I-I-I didn’t care at that poin- fuck! Teddy! Harder!” Teddy threw his head down and held Billy’s hips tighter to support them, while Billy grabbed the headboard when they reached it. Teddy pushed Billy’s legs over his broad shoulders, before slamming his hips harder and harder, the headboard banging against the wall. Billy made sure to reinforce it or they’ll be hovering outside New York’s skyline naked with a hole in the wall. Speaking of, Billy’s clenched around Teddy’s huge green member like his life depended on it.

“A-and, And! I didn’t know who- Fuck! Who they were! I. Didn’t. care!” He gritted his teeth together and continued his pace.

“H-how did R-rey learn how to- ah ah ah ahh fuck fuck, how to – ah, force heal!” cried Billy tilting his head back. All he could see was the roof and Teddy’s sweaty blonde hair as his head was ducked. “I-imagine if- ah ah, all the Jedi could see this- ahh”

“H-having a Rey moment, huh?” Teddy looked at him with a laugh “They’ll be wishing they got to miss out on this- ahh fuck baby, ughhhh”

“Ahh, I’m gonna need the strength of all of them tomorrow- haha-ahhh ahh fuck” Billy replied through moans “oh shit, Teddy! Gods, don’t stop, don’t ever stop” Teddy grabbed the headboard to hold Billy’s hands as he continued to smash deep, slowing down a little to hit deeper. He reached down again just to make out for as long as he can, practically panting into each other’s mouths. Billy’s feet rubbed across his lower back, one attempting to touch his equally gorgeous ass. The moonlight shined from the one-way window, illuminating their bodies, Teddy’s mostly hairless skin shining like emerald. Billy felt like he could just faint or wake up from this dream at any moment. The feeling of Teddy’s thrusts with his enormous dick up his gut, along with his amazing lips attached to his, was probably the best feeling in the world. Teddy pulled out of the kiss and spoke up again. 

“I freaking hate that Rey, ahh, and Leia were just used for Kylo’s dev-v-velopment” he said, picking up the pace again “They deserved better, ah Billy!”

“Oh- fuck! Ahh!” Billy really wanted to speak but he was almost incapable “Thank- ah, thank gods tha- ah aha, he di-i-ed, though”

“But. that. meant. Leia. pretty. much. didn’t. need. to. die. except. have. someone. to. revive. Rey!” Teddy thrusted in between words, then faster again instead of deeper out of frustration. Pretty sure he’s made a dint in the wall already, wasn’t the first time “Fuck that movie”

“B-but at least it fixed- fuuuck, fixed some t-things riiiight?” Billy replied, for once looking on the bright side of things instead of Teddy. They were both obsessed with Star Wars, Teddy arguably more-so as soon as he found out he was an alien, which was why he seemed more pissed off at it. But he can be passionate, for better or worse. “You can’t- ah, expect-t perfffection, sweetie. But at least- shit! Fuck me! Snoke’s baaaahhhckstory got reveeeeald!” he kept trying to lift his head but a thrust later he snapped back on the pillow “A-and Rey’s parent’s beeeing- ahhhh, somebody!”

“True I guess, ahh fuck, Snoke was lame” Teddy moaned “A-and I guess we’re none to- ah, talk! We came from somebody! Just wish Last freaking Jedi didn’t waste the time to- ah, develop it!”

“Calm yourself! Anger is the- ahh! Path to the dark side!” Billy knew a good quote would Teddy enjoy himself more.

“Oh fuck, you did not! hahahh” Teddy half-laughed, half-moaned. He kissed Billy again, letting go of the headboard and grabbed Billy’s waist again. Billy did the same with Teddy’s back and hair as he thrusted hard. “Mmph, I’m so close, baby, keep talking- ahh”

“Hit me with that big green lightsaber babe- ahhhh fuck, Teddy, harder! Strike me down! Fire your- ahh, missile in my exhaust port, rebel scum” Teddy couldn’t hold on any longer and cummed deep inside Billy. The sensation immediately let Billy explode too, shooting his own across his chest up to his jaw. Teddy slowed his pace as both he and Billy caught their breath. He leaned down to kiss Billy once more, this time slowly, taking his time. Once he came to a complete stop, Teddy pulled out, earning a whine from Billy due to the sudden emptiness. Teddy grabbed a tissue from the bedside to wipe Billy’s leaking hole, definitely need to change the sheets after, unless magic can help. Billy could clean himself up, but it’s far less intimate. Teddy tossed the tissue in the bin across the room, hitting accurately like a basketball, before turning to Billy. He looked stunning. His tired, naked body bathing in the moonlight, eyes glimmering and his smile filled with content. His black hair was a mess, both it and his body calming down from the sweat. Chest was heaving up and down slower by the second, while his dick was still semi just from looking at Teddy like that. 

“You’re so beautiful” Teddy said as he leaned back down to Billy’s deflating dick. He held it in his hand and lapped at the cut head to clean it up.

“Ahh- o-only because I’m so in love” Billy giggled as Teddy let go of his dick.Teddy raised an eyebrow and giggled in response. 

“No, haha no. Because I’m so in love with you” replied Teddy licking the trail of cum across Billy’s abs up to his pecs.

“So- ahh, so love has blinded you?” Billy said as Teddy licked at his neck again, putting a hickey on the opposite side than before.

“Mmph, That’s not exactly what I meant” replied Teddy, licking the drop left on Billy’s jaw slowly, licking his lips after.

“But-“ Billy said running his hand through Teddy’s hair before stroking his cheek with his thumb “it’s probably true” Teddy smiled so wide and leaned down to kiss Billy softly, before opening up. Billy could still taste himself on Teddy’s lips and his tongue, he’s used to that too. In a weird, gross way he found it romantic, as romantic as reciting cheesy Star Wars prequel dialogue. 

“This is so much better” said Teddy softly, calmed down entirely and returned to his sweet side “But it’s true, I love you so much baby”

“I love you too, Ted, so so much” Billy replied, trying to level up with the sweetness. He waved his hand and the sheet moved underneath them and then over them.

“You wanna shower, or get new undies?” Teddy asked at the sudden sheet movement.

“No, no worry. I’m comfy like this” He said and Teddy nodded, rolling off Billy and on his back. Billy shuffled and laid his head on Teddy’s chest.

“Do you want me to go back to human?” Teddy asked, just realizing he was still bulky and green. The bed was reinforced to hold the added muscle weight after one incident early on.

Billy looked up at him with a raised eyebrow “Even after all these years-“

“Four?” 

“-After all these years, you still don’t get that this is normal you. You look… so handsome babe” 

“T-thanks, sorry. It’s a force of habit” 

“That’s alright. Besides I wanna keep the space theme, my dorky alien hunk” he replied, snuggling into his chest and rubbing it with his hand. 

“Gods I love you” Teddy kissed Billy’s head softly as he put his arms around his much smaller frame “Goodnight baby”

“Goodnight sweetie” Billy replied kissing the area above his heart “I love you too. Dream of a good Star Wars movie”. Teddy giggled with him and snuggled deeper, off to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
